Game 41: Ninja Gaiden and Ninja Gaiden

Ninja Gaiden and Ninja Gaiden are NES and Xbox games with the exact same name. Ninja Gaiden for the NES came out in 1989 and Ninja Gaiden for the Xbox came out in 2004. I'm not sure why Tecmo and lead designer Itagaki didn't give the Xbox Ninja Gaiden game a subtitle, but it's too late to wonder, because there are officially two games under the name of Ninja Gaiden, just released 15 years apart. In first hour tradition, I will be only playing Ninja Gaiden for one hour, but because they are named exactly the same, I will first play half an hour of Ninja Gaiden for the NES, and then half an hour on the Xbox. This will complicate the review a bit, but I'll try to always make is clear what game I'm talking about.

This is an exciting time for the Ninja Gaiden series, as Ninja Gaiden: Dragon Sword was released last month for the DS and Ninja Gaiden II will be out in a few weeks for the Xbox 360. Remember, this is a new Ninja Gaiden II, not Ninja Gaiden II: The Dark Sword of Chaos which was released on the NES in 1990. Yeah, Tecmo does it again. I plan on playing Dragon Sword (not Dark Sword) someday as it sounds pretty cool, but this review is all about the first hour of the two Ninja Gaidens. So let's get right down to it. To start, the first thirty minutes of Ninja Gaiden for the NES.

(minutes are in bold)
00 - Begin Ninja Gaiden NES. I was about to press Start to begin the game, when a story cutscene began! Two ninjas are facing each other in a green field with a giant moon overhead. They begin running at each other with the game just showing their legs moving at high speed.
01 - They jump and meet in the air in front of the moon! Their swords clash and they both land on their feet. In classic movie fashion though, the ninja wearing pink then stumbles to the ground. Some text appears wondering why he fought and died, must be the main character, Ryu, speaking.

02 - A young man is on screen now, he looks young but he's got huge, muscular arms. He's reading a letter from his father. He tells Ryu to take the family's Dragon sword and go to America to meet an archaeologist named Walter Smith. "Ryu, be always brave..." "I will get my revenge!" Pretty epic!

03 - I press Start and the real gameplay of Ninja Gaiden begins. Act one. The game starts right off with Ryu in the streets. A is jump and B is sword slash.
04 - Enemies explode in one slash of my sword! There's some kind of ninja dog running around being annoying. Lame pup. Ryu can't double jump. Isn't it ninja law that all ninjas must learn how to double jump before anything else?

05 - There's an enemy above me and I have no idea how to get to him. Oh sweet I just jumped and attached myself to a street sign! Wow cool you can jump off of walls, this has to be one of the first games to ever allow that.

06 - I picked up some sort of power-up that when I jump I do a cool ninja swirl with my sword that protects myself.
07 - I have reached the first boss. I was fooling around so much in the first stage that my time almost ran out! It was actually really fun to hop around and jump off of buildings.

08 - Well, that guy really wasn't that hard. He was pretty tall though so I had to jump off the wall Chun-Li style to get over his head. He was really slow though so I just slashed him in the back a lot.

09 - A cutscene, our ninja thinks these thugs are following him. How could street bums be following a ninja?

10 - A "girl" appears behind him. She has a gun! She shot Ryu! And thus Act 2 begins.
11 - More cutscenes, Ryu is in jail now but the woman appears and gives him a statue and lets him escape. Odd. Ryu asks, "didn't you try to kill me?" Good question.

12 - I regain control and I'm now in some underground cave. Probably some evil overlord's lair.

13 - Ugh, the platforming is getting tougher now with small little areas to land on and anti-ninja bats flying all over. I fall in a pit. The level restarts.

14 - Man, there's like unlimited of these annoying ninja dogs. What the heck? I had to wall jump up a ladder to get to the next area above me, but then I wall jumped off and fell to where I should have been before and died. Lame!
15 - OH. You can climb the ladder like a normal video game character. Nice. The game was kind enough to let me off where I died just now.

16 - Sweet, you can throw shurikens by pressing up and B at the same time after you collect some.

17 - Oh no I died again! Game Over! Back to the beginning of Stage 2. Dang, a ninja dog just knocked me into a pit.

18 - Ryu just attached himself to a wall that I had no choice but to jump into the abyss. Game Over again.
19 - You can pick up a flaming shuriken that makes enemies explode. That's pretty cool.

20 - Woah, I finally made it outside the cave lair. Backgrounds look pretty good honestly. What the heck... there's like ghosts and dragonflies out here trying to kill me. Well, the dragonflies are for collecting stuff but there's bad men with machine guns!

21 - I made it to the end of the level and it looked like there was no where to go, so I went the only place I thought I could. Down. Died.
22 - Oh, you're supposed to climb a ladder down, not just jump. I got a sweet power-up though that put a ring of fire around me, so I was jumping from small pillar to small pillar killing guys instantly. But the invincibility ran out the moment I hit a guy with a sword and he knocked me into a pit, killing me.

24 - Game over but the game started me outside again, not bad. I got my vengeance on the sword wielding edge hogger with my awesome ring of fire.

27 - Man, this is such a hardcore platformer. There's this small little pillar I have to jump to and a guy is standing on it! Get off!

28 - Well, I finally got past him and got killed by the next guy. What's the point of 15 life points when you always die from falling off?
29 - This game wouldn't be nearly as hard if you didn't always jump fall back three feet after being hit.

30 - Begin Ninja Gaiden Xbox. Okay, that's enough of the original Ninja Gaiden! I admit, I suck at it! Now onto the new Xbox version! I select New Game and the game starts telling me about the "evil Dark Dragon Blade" and a really ugly full of jaggies sword appears. What the... this is nasty looking. The guy keeps talking to me in Japanese as I try to keep up with the subtitles. Whoever uses the sword will become evil.

31 - Oh, now the Dragon Sword appears, as opposed to the Dragon Blade I guess? This sword too is also made up of graphical jaggies. The Dragon Sword is owned by the Hayabusa family. A ninja appears in the background, it's Ryu!
32 - A wall of text appears, it is the Book of Fiends. This serves as the loading screen but the reading is pretty boring. Ancient tribes have struggled for thousands of generations. You know how long thousands of generations is? That's like a minimum of 20,000 years. That's a really long time. Still loading.

33 - More text appears, wait, it's the same stuff from before. Oh, the loading is finally done. Chapter 1 - The Way of the Ninja. Ryu jumps from the top of a waterfall and slices a brown-clad ninja in half. Sweet.

34 - Some woman is looking down on my from the cliffs, and then I get control. The gameplay is really smooth, feels like Assassin's Creed. Woah, the right thumbstick does not control the camera, just zooms me into Ryu's view. That's going to be annoying.
35 - Something got thrown against the cliff wall... it's a in-game hint! Must be from that girl ninja. The hint is about climbing walls, seems to work just like Assassin's Creed and Prince of Persia.

36 - Ryu doesn't open chests with his hands, he kicks them open with his big, black boot. I receive an Elixir of Spiritual Life. Some vines are blocking my apparent path but Ryu's ultra-sharp katana can't cut them down. Lame.

37 - Not sure where to go...

38 - I find a locked door, no dice though.
39 - Oh, I have to climb a fallen tree that's laying over the vines I mentioned before.

40 - My first kills! I kick one brown ninja off the cliff and impale another with my dragon sword. Game is kind of bloody, but the blood doesn't stick around.

41 - I wall jump into a cave and then more brown ninjas appear. I kill them easily.

42 - I have just wall jumped into a building complex. It is the Ninja Fortress! Oh neat, I can throw shurikens, just like in the original.
43 - I get a map of the fortress and check it out, seems confusing. Don't think I'll bother with this much. Why is it angled? That's just annoying.

45 - I just fought about ten brown ninjas in a small, locked room. Is there a block button in this game?

46 - Apparently block is the L button. I discover a suit of samurai armor in a corner, but it is missing its mask. I probably need to find that.

47 - A ton more browns appear, when a ninja dies, its soul is transformed into a small yellow ball. What a ripoff of Onimusha!
49 - Ooh, white ninjas! These guys jump around like little hamsters. I wall jump myself and finish them off with a well timed slice of my blade. I think my biggest enemy is the camera though, this thing is obnoxious.

50 - Whoops, just fell into a trapdoor. I'm now underground and the anti-ninja bats are back (see minute 13). Some things never change.

51 - I find the Fangs of the Samurai in a chest down there and start to look for a way out, guess I was supposed to fall down here. Just noticed that Ryu does this sweet little flip when he throws shurikens while running.

53 - I'm out of the caves now and back to the Ninja Fortress.
54 - Just racked up a 17 hit combo on some bad ninjas and it restored my health. Nice. You can also jump on the heads of ninjas and it sort of leaves this shadow behind, pretty cool animation. Oh, a save point. Must be a boss up ahead...

56 - I insert the Fangs of the Samurai into the armor and get the Key of Courage. This room I have to keep running through spews new white ninjas every time. Get out of my way, I'm running out of time!

57 - Ryu reaches the Inner Sanctum and I get a hint on how to roll from my purple-clad female friend. I use the Key of Courage on the door.

58 - Oh snaps I just decapitated a white ninja! Awesome! Then another! You can hold Y to charge up a super attack that triggers a hands-off super combo.
59 - A man with long gray hair is sitting on the floor of a large room, he's wielding nunchucks. He stands up and shows off his nunchuck skills by twirling them all over, I'm not impressed. We begin to fight.

60 - Okay, this guy is a bastard. I have to use all of my healing potions to beat him but I eventually do by jumping off the walls onto his head. He was blocking everything else and breaking my block with his nasty combos. After the fight, we bow and then sit down on the floor and chill out! All that work for some tea! A moment later though my ninja friend runs in, it is Ayane from Dead or Alive! Ryu's village is on fire! Too bad the hour is up for Ninja Gaiden.

Time for some scores out of 10.
Story: NES - 7 and Xbox - 3
Definitely more story than I was expecting from a half hour of an old NES game! Ninja Gaiden (NES) sets up as a revenge story that really reminds me of Shenmue. Except Ryu Hayabusa became a ninja and Ryo Hazuki just asks for sailors. Becoming a ninja is awesome. Let's take a quick look at the opening scene with the ninjas in the grassy field. This was directed incredibly well for what is basically a 20 year old game. Nice backdrop with the moon and impressive close ups of our two opposing ninjas.

And definitely less story than I was expecting from a half hour of a modern Xbox game! The game starts off with a bunch of cryptic descriptions on Dragon Blades and Dragon Swords and then tosses a giant wall of text at me about Ancient Tribes. None of it seems to fit together. After that, there's not a drop of story until the very end of the half hour when Ayane runs in and announces the village I've never seen is on fire (what, is this an RPG?).

Graphics and Sound: NES - 6 and Xbox - 9
After the impressive opening cutscene, Ninja Gaiden on the NES quickly reminded me I was playing an 8-bit game. The graphics were sharp but the colors just seemed washed out. It looked great at the time but I can't hold it up against its peers infinitely. I believe the most impressive thing about the game's graphics were the backgrounds. They were well detailed and propped the game up a bit graphically. Ninja Gaiden's sound was pretty basic and there wasn't much outside the music.

The Xbox Ninja Gaiden looks really awesome, the graphics are gorgeous and the framerate is nice and slick. Definitely no major complaints, but that obviously means I have a minor one. I feel like the game is almost too sharp, I think it could have used some filters to soften some things up. Oh, and the blood and bad guys shouldn't disappear so fast! I want to see the marvels of my awesome swordplay!

Gameplay: NES - 6 and Xbox - 8
Ninja Gaiden (NES) has precise, but difficult gameplay. This is a tough platformer and I was really surprised that after I got Game Overs, I was restarted pretty close to where I had lost my final life. This is a great bonus as it encouraged me to keep trying without getting too frustrated. Many games these days aren't as kind! The controls are obviously simple on the NES, but we get the nice little bonus of throwing shurikens. If only you could throw them at an angle.

Well, you can throw shurikens at an angle in Ninja Gaiden on the Xbox, and it's pretty cool too! Actually, the fighting is pretty great in the 3D action-adventure game, the hardest part is dealing with the camera. It just never did what I wanted it to do and I had a hard time keeping track of more than one or two enemies. Either way, cameras are never an easy thing to develop properly, especially when you have such a fast-paced game. Leaping around is very smooth and decapitating ninjas never grows old.

Fun Factor: NES - 7 and Xbox - 8
Though Ninja Gaiden for the NES is tough, it was actually pretty fun. The story was actually decently interesting even if it was pretty derivative. I really thought I was going to get owned left or right while playing but the first half hour must be tame compared to the rest of the game. The game had a few headache inducing moments but hard games can really be fun if they're still rewarding and not totally unfair.

The Xbox Ninja Gaiden is not as frustrating as the NES game, but it is still really challenging. I suppose in this game you get health potions instead of nicely placed checkpoints, but you get ganged up quite quickly and must fend off multiple enemies. This is totally different than a platformer and you must have your finger ready on the block button if you want to be successful. The boss just seemed unfair though, he was whooping on me and my health bar like there was no tomorrow, and I only beat him because I was being cheap. I feel dirty.

Minutes to Action: NES - 3 and Xbox - 5

Overall: NES - 7 and Xbox - 8
Yes, I am awarding nearly identical scores to the first half hour of both Ninja Gaiden games. Some of you may be thinking, how could you possibly award a 15 year old game only one point less than its modern day counterpart? Well, that's a good question and I will answer it: the games were obviously released in totally different video game eras. And they're each good, above average games when compared against their peers. Remember, this is just the first half hour of each game, which is even less than what I normally play! Both games are fun though, but surprisingly the NES version has a better story! The Xbox Ninja Gaiden just throws a block of text at you that really doesn't seem applicable to what I was then playing. Though it does seem kind of weird that the NES game's story hinges on finding some random American. Graphically, the Xbox version is near the top of its game. Both games get good scores, and I would recommend trying them both out! If only to get owned in both 2D and 3D.

Ninja Gaiden galore! I think that's enough of Ryu Hayabusa for a while. And ninjas, geez, I just realized I did Pocky & Rocky last week which featured a female ninja.

Wow.

Game 36: Mystery Dungeon: Shiren the Wanderer

Mystery Dungeon: Shiren the Wanderer is a new Nintendo DS adventure that is actually a port of a 1995 Super Nintendo game released only in Japan. Shiren's gameplay is based off the classic computer games Rogue and NetHack. This means randomly generated stages, turn-based gameplay, and harsh character death penalties. Games today are wussified to the point of being able to save anywhere and three hour long tutorials that wean you into the game, Mystery Dungeon is kind of a breath of fresh air. Even if it is a 13 year-old breath, it mixes up the portable scene a bit.

Not much left to say about Mystery Dungeon, I think the review and screenshots will explain the game pretty well.

(minutes are in bold)
00 - I select "Create a Travel Journal" and the first hour begins. I leave the character's name as Shiren (pronounced she-ren if you're wondering). A scroll unravels and the story begins... The Divine Bird of Legend, the Golden Condor lives in a golden city. A man named Shiren is looking for this city in memory of his friend.

01 - He has a pet weasel who talks to him. The pair are in Kobami Valley. In the distance we can see a tal, narrow mountain with a waterfall falling from it. Beautiful. The weasel introduces himself, his name is Koppa.
02 - Shiren is sleeping now, on the top screen is his dream. Looks like the mountain top and the golden condor are merging together.

03 - Still the opening cutscene as Shiren leaves the hut. Ah, the game is really starting now, the first level is called, "Road to the Hamlet." A tutorial begins. "Use A to defeat monsters and get to the stairs." Just A, huh? Oh, use B to move faster. Well that's easy enough.

04 - Woah, immediately after reading the dialogue I get attacked by a monster! I take him down with some timely presses of the A button. Is Shiren using a sword or what?

05 - The world is laid out like a grid, think walking around in Final Fantasy VI. What the heck? Holding B just kinda teleports Shiren across the screen. It's almost like I'm fast-forwarding the game... I'm going to be very leery of this B button.

06 - I fight another rabbit or something and get some experience for killing it. You regain HP by walking around, which is nice I suppose. This game seems very forced RPG though. Enemies run up and it's almost like a short turn-based battle between you and the baddie.

07 - I find a rice ball that I'm supposed to eat to reduce my hunger. Odd.

08 - Sweet, level 2! There's a convenient mini-map on the screen that shows me the areas I've uncovered and the positions of characters and enemies around me. Just killed a rabbit in one hit.

09 - I'm on the next level of the stage, oh, a robber is trying to kill me! He goes down in one hit. By the way, the rabbits are technically called Mamels.

10 - I find 133 Gitans on the ground. Gitans are the game's currency. Next I find and equip a wooden shield.

12 - Shiren just found a cudgel! Nice. And I also reach level 3.
13 - The game informs me that I may die of hunger if I don't eat rice balls. Ouch. My "fullness rating" is 53/100, guess I'll have a snack. That popped me up to 100/100!

16 - I'm just walking around now, killing bad guys, getting experience, and finding stairways. Nothing really to it all right now, pretty easy.

17 - Oh, I have successfully cleared the adventure. Interesting. Shiren is level 4 and my score is 70643. Next stage is Canyon Hamlet.

19 - I guess this is less of a stage and more of a town where I can talk to people and store items. I store a spare wooden shield in the warehouse.
21 - After talking to some villagers in the bar, I learn more about the game's gameplay. If you die in the game, you return to Canyon Hamlet and are reset to level 1! Woah, if you eat monster flesh you turn into that monster! Awesome! Reminds me of Final Fantasy Legend III.

23 - Interesting... every time you make a move, the monsters also move, but if you don't move, they won't move either. Good stuff to know, and pretty much confirms my suspicions of being a turn-based RPG.

26 - Well, Shiren has left the hamlet and is now on the Old Cedar Road. There are more villages every four areas.

27 - I'm in a forest now, and the gameplay seems a little deeper now that I have more information on the game.

28 - I encounter another wanderer in the forest, this guy shows off his +15 Katana and says he kept having it smithied on over and over again at the blacksmith. You think he would have called it something besides his +15 Katana.
30 - Woah, I just got whomped on by a boss I think! His name was Snaky and he was hitting me for 5-7 damage when I only have 19 total! Well, that's it for that adventure, my Shiren is returned to the hamlet's inn. I'm also back to level 1 and I don't have any items! Ouch.

32 - I go retrieve my wooden shield from the warehouse and equip it. I head right back out to the Old Cedar Road. I'm doing a lot less damage now without my trusty cudgel.

34 - What the... I just tripped over a rock, took damage, and dropped everything I had. Lame.

36 - This game is pretty easy when you don't have bosses beating down on you. Guess I just have to level up a bit before I challenge Snaky again.

38 - I entered an area thinking I was going to fight Snaky again, but turns out I'm at some mountain stream. And this chick is hitting on me! "I can make you feel special. Would you close your eyes for me?" What the... wonder how much this costs?
39 - I was blinded! All I can see is Shiren and the mini-map! This sucks.

40 - Phew, I can see again. Good thing there weren't any enemies.

41 - Oh man, speaking of enemies, Snaky just blitzed me! But this time I used a healing item and was able to take him out through attrition.

42 - Lame, Snaky wasn't a boss at all, just a normal enemy. I know this because I just fought another one! And then two at once! Unfair!
45 - No bad guys for a few minutes, but I'm starting to get hungry so I eat the rice ball I found at the beginning of my journey. It gives me 50 fullness points.

46 - I have reached Bamboo Village. Typical twangy Japanese music is playing.

47 - I enter a shop and there's crap laying all over the floor. One guy in the bar did say something about stealing... What, this ugly kid just said he was my brother. Odd.

49 - I buy a cudgel with my available funds.
50 - I'm back adventuring now, and the first thing that happens is a monster that steals 80% of my money and then runs off before I can kill him. Bastard. Another pickpocket has just stolen the last 20%. I'm sad.

52 - The good news is that I can beat Snaky's in only two hits now.

54 - I'm back in Bamboo Village, must have taken a wrong turn somewhere... Just found the blacksmith though, he can upgrade my weapon for 1000 Gitan. I only have 200 now thanks to those pickpockets.

55 - This village is really badly designed. There are a bunch of buildings and they are really spread apart so you have no idea where you're walking to next. There's just path after path and then a random building.

57 - A scene starts as I enter the bar, it's Pekeji, the brute who says he's my brother. I sympathize with him for a bit and then he wanders off. Weird.59 - Well, enough of that village, I'm now on Pegasus Ridge. Wow, there are fire-breathing Firepuffs up here. They sound fluffy but they look like mini dragons! One of them almost kills me.

60 - There's a lot more enemies on Pegasus Ridge and they're a lot tougher. Nothing is too tough for Shiren though as he hits level 7. But that's it for the first hour of Mystery Dungeon: Shiren the Wanderer.

Now for some scores out of 10.

Story: 4
There isn't much story in Mystery Dungeon beyond the opening cutscene, and there's not much meat there either. We have this wanderer named Shiren who is accompanied by a talking weasel. Shiren says his motivation for wandering and finding the golden city is because of his friend, who has died or something. My favorite aspect of this game's story is that there are also a lot of other wanderers/warriors hanging out in the levels, doing their thing. It reminds me of Final Fantasy X where there are a few other groups of people working parallel to you on the same quest.

Graphics and Sound: 5
An important part to consider when developing or porting a Nintendo DS game is effective use of both screens. Mystery Dungeon does not use the top screen well at all, it's just an overall map that is useless. I would rather see my current stats or maybe place the mini-map up there instead of overlaying it on the bottom screen. The graphics are also pretty simplistic, I don't know how they compare to the original Super Famicon version but the grid-based gameplay and a relatively confined playing area don't hold this game back as much as you would think.

The sound in Shiren the Wanderer is nothing special. The music is generic Japanese twangs and I honestly can't even remember if there are sound effects when fighting. Nothing stands out.

Gameplay: 7
Undoubted the most unique aspect of Mystery Dungeon is its wannabe-hardcore gameplay. All maps are randomly generated, though in the first hour they're all still pretty simplistic. But in this game, if you die, that's it, you're done. You restart at level one and are returned to the original village, losing all items you were carrying. I'm guessing this makes Mystery Dungeon all about slowly powering up your weapons and armor, while carefully making sure you don't lose them. I'm not sure how much I like the sound of that, but in its first hour, it's a pretty typical Zelda-style game with turn-based elements. All these combinations makes this game unique, but definitely not for everyone.

Fun Factor: 8
I actually had a pretty good time playing the first hour of Shiren the Wanderer. Once I realized that this game is turn-based it added some new layers of strategy that made me rethink what I was planning when enemies were around. There are some really annoying parts though like "running" which I'm pretty sure is literally just the game fast-forwarding itself. Worst of all, the areas that are NOT randomly generated are horribly designed. Basically every town is way too sprawled out and just plain obnoxious to navigate. Fighting is much more fun than running errands.

Minutes to Action: 4

Overall: 6
Mystery Dungeon: Shiren the Wanderer's first hour is just a slightly above average port of an old game and even older gameplay. The game runs with a unique concept that most console only gamers will never have experienced, and I believe most will be frustrated. The first hour though is nothing special. If you want to try something new, then this game seems like a really good portable experience for the patient gamer. If you're impatient or annoyed by strict death rules, then definitely pass on Shiren. By the way, what kind of lame name is Mystery Dungeon anyway? It sounds as lame Final Fantasy would now if the first game was just coming out.

The Japanese cover for Mystery Dungeon is so much better than the English release.

Game 30: Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams

Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams is the fourth Onimusha game in the main series and was released in early 2006 for the PlayStation 2. I personally love the Onimusha series and find them some of the most satisfying games around. The games are heavy on katanas, demons, and blood, and Dawn of Dreams is no exception. I was introduced to the series after the second one came out and I've been playing them ever since. I even rented the crappy Super Smash Bros. ripoff, Blade Warriors. Back to Dawn of Dreams though, this game was actually kind of an unexpected sequel. After the third game was released, Capcom repeatedly said that this was to be the final Onimusha game, even though the game's own ending seemingly contradicts this. Thankfully though, this was an outright lie and the series went on.

Dawn of Dreams is a hack-and-slash game set in late 16th century Japan. Many of the heroes and villains are based on important historical figures at this time, just imbued with generally evil and demon-like powers. This makes for a really interesting alternate history game where the timeline kind of veers off onto a crazy path and eventually meets back up when things settle down. Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams continues to use completely 3D backgrounds, thus giving the player complete control over the camera (this opposed to pre-rendered backgrounds with pre-determined camera angles, the technique used for the first two games) and overall better control over your hero. You also have a second member with you most of the time allowing you to switch between characters for combos and using different powers. Capcom may not have originally wanted a fourth game, but it seems they had enough ideas to start the series anew. But let's play the first hour of Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams and see if they pulled it off.

(minutes are in bold)
00 - I select New Game and the first hour begins. The classic Onimusha ringing sound effect goes off and the opening cinematic begins. It's the year 1596, two men are on a rooftop and they're about to do battle. The two look battle hardened and one appears to be wearing an Onimusha outfit, the other names himself as Mitsunari, retainer to the Toyotomi Clan.
01 - The Onimusha-clad warrior is Tenkai. They exchange words for a long time and then finally do battle. Mitsunari defends himself well and then sends a wave of giant centipedes at Tenkai and holds him in the air, dangling.

02 - Tenkai strikes back and stabs Mitsunari with his polearm, but then Mitsunari swings him around and throws him off the building. Only if the Black Oni arrives will his plan be stopped, Mitsunari announces to no one in particular. Foreshadowing. We switch to a town scene, in the distance is a giant castle with something evil looking growing out of it.

03 - Suddenly the castle erupts and the town begins to cave in on itself. Destruction everywhere. A little girl is left standing alone in her kimono, suddenly a bunch of skeleton warriors run at her! Just before she is killed, our hero appears!
04 - He destroys scores of bad guys single handedly, I wish I could play this scene but it's still the opening video. This guy is not Tenkai from the opening. Coming from the castle is a horde of bad guys: ninjas, flying creatures, and 200 foot tall colossi! Our man yells "HIDEOYOSHI!" (think "TETSUO!") and then pulls a red sword from his back.

05 - He's glowing blue now, the 200 foot tall colossus actually seems scared, rightfully so because this guy can fly! His two swords decimate the giant in one quick slice and our Japanese blonde walks towards the camera through the dust.

06 - He then bends down to give the little girl her ball back. Looks like he's not out of trouble yet, enemies rush in as he does some fancy sword moves and the title screen appears: Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams.
07 - The first chapter is about to start, Stage 1: Dawn of Nightmares. Ah, now I'm looking at the in-game graphics for the first time, and I also get control. The game looks so incredibly different! Some hints appear at the top of the screen: Square is attack, X absorbs souls.

08 - If I hold R1 I can lock on and see the bad guys' health. More skeletons approach me. L1 blocks, that's good to know.

09 - Locking on seems to help a lot as Soki (our blue clad, blonde hero) will just start comboing his sword at thin air!
10 - In-game cutscene of the one of the super giants knocking down a building, Soki looks ready to fight him! But am I? He hops onto a building and faces him down.

12 - The giant is knocking down the buildings I'm trying to fight him on, but I can't attack him directly right now. I'm just killing skeletons. Ah, finally a new enemy! They just look a little fiercer and don't appear to be resurrected peasants. I also level up, interesting! Oh, now I'm facing the colossus for real! Soki glows and turns into an Onimusha! Basically a super human with glowing eyes.

13 - The giant is doing typical stupid giant stuff like getting his sword stuck in the building so I can hack at his arm. But he is shooting a chest machine gun at me... odd. Oh, I should mention that there's like rock music playing. Not as bad as Prince of Persia: The Warrior Within though.
14 - After a few hits his giant sword flies away. His health meter still has plenty of life left in it though.

15 - Okay, now his swordless hand is getting "stuck" in the roof. Lame. He also performs this giant sweeping hand motion that seems unavoidable.

16 - The brute goes down and I receive 1000 exp. Soki delivers the finishing blow by running up his arm and slashing his face, trying to be all Legolas-like The colossus explodes, haha!
17 - Soki looks pretty sweet with white hair and evil looking eyes. Ah, a cutscene: ancient Japanese art (Okami style) appears. A woman's voice begins telling the story so far. Nobunaga had attempted to use Genma (demons, baddies, not really a Japanese word) to take over the land, but the Onimusha stopped him (this is basically a really quick recap of the first three games, minus the time travel and Frenchmen). Then Hideyoshi Toyotomi took over and united Japan (this is what was hinted at during the Onimusha 3 ending... but it also happened in real life).

18 - Hideyoshi is not a nice man either. On June 29th, 1596, the Omen Star appeared in the sky. Hideyoshi changed that day and Japan fell under chaos. Massacres and slaughter all over, including Westerners arriving there for the first time.
19 - Then an earthquake hits Kyoto! Genma climb out of the cracks and start taking over Japan. The art shows the land on fire with demons killing humans. Ouch.

20 - I'm asked to save, nah. Stage 2, The Blue Demon. Two years later... January 1598 in the Plains of Suruga. Soki is lying in a house when some genma start walking down the center of town carrying what looks like a tree.

21 - Soki wakes up (he's fully armored out and he even has horns in his head). All of a sudden some weirdo pops out from the ceiling, Minokuchi! He's like tucked in a small sack hanging from the roof. Soki heads outside to confront the Genma.
22 - He tells the lead Genma on a flaming horse to head home. Ah, they are carrying cherry blossom trees. This town seems absolutely deserted except for Soki, oh and Minokuchi, who suddenly appears flying about carrying a sword.

23 - Soki is ticked that the demons ate some bugs, not sure what that means. Soki draws his sword and challenges the Genma. Looks like a fight!

25 - The bigger they are, the harder they fall. This guy was kind of tough, guarding was incredibly important as he knocks my energy away quickly with giant hits, but I whittle him down slowly. Hitting Triangle unleashes Oni Magic which delivers some large damage using the power of Oni, or something.

26 - Another cutscene of a crow and two people standing on a building. One is a woman, the other Mitsunari from the opening cutscene. He says the Blue Demon (Soki) is famous for being a traitor to Hideyoshi.
27 - Soki set the tree on fire and it seems to be moaning and crying out. Minokuchi... seriously? What is this guy and where is he hanging from? We're outdoors and he's still dangling from something.

28 - Back inside my house, our two friends Soki and Minokuchi discuss what just happened. I guess I can rest here before I head out again.

29 - I can save here along with enhancing my equipment with the souls I've collected. I level up my sword and armor a few times. I can also learn new skills from points I earned when leveling up. I put all of my points into Attack and Thrust.

31 - Geez, there's also a shop here run by some scary dude that could be Minokuchi's great-grandfather. I buy some medicine to refill my health in the future. I guess I'd better save in case I blow it.
32 - Next up I speak with Minokuchi for a bit. Seems like his life goal is to become a samurai... too bad he's two feet tall and hangs from the ceiling in a potato sack.

34 - I head for the door to leave, and then Soki decides to sleep. Stage 3, Jubei Has Arrived! Jubei... that's the main character from Onimusha 2. It's now February and a cutscene is playing. A young woman with one glowing red eye is walking through town when she gets approached by two drunk looking men. Guys, she's wearing a short sword and dressed like a mini samurai, do you really want to mess with her?

35 - She ends up breaking one guy's mug and basically breaks another guy's neck! She asks for the Blue Demon.
36 - Minokuchi has some sixth sense and is able to tell that there is a "child" in trouble. I think this girl can handle herself pretty well. But Soki decides to head out anyway as he doesn't know that. Time to make my way towards her, but the Genma think otherwise!

38 - I find the diary of a drunkard (literally). He writes about how the world has gone to hell and his only solace is the bottle.

40 - I find a puzzle box on the ground, to receive its contents I have to solve a color puzzle. I have to rotate these colored circles so that there's a straight line of one color from left to right. Kind of hard to explain but this one was really easy. I even received the Fire Dance sword!

42 - Woah, I just critical killed an enemy by hitting him right before he hit me! The screen went white and he went down with just the single blow, I also got a bunch of extra souls for that. This move could come in handy.
44 - Not really sure where I'm going, I find a piece of burnt wood to walk over but Soki refuses to cross because it won't hold his weight. Then I find a small hole here that someone small could squeeze through... suspicious.

46 - Some archers appear but they're expectedly weak. I reach level 6 as they fall. Nice.

47 - The game is trying to stop me from proceeding by placing a one foot tall cart in my way, lame level design. I approach another small hole and then a cutscene begins.

48 - It's the girl again, geez her red eye is creeping me out. Minokuchi sneaks up behind her and scares her. She also isn't very happy to see the Blue Demon! She starts fighting with me but Soki recognizes her fighting style.
49 - Sweet, time to do battle with this rugrat.

50 - This chick is quick but I corner her and give her a whallop. She says her name is Yagyu Jubei, Soki is stunned. Minokuchi starts crying that we're out of time and then a bunch of Genma approach. Is it time for a tag team battle with Jubei?

52 - I can give Jubei instructions using the D-pad, but I can't seem to control her directly yet...

54 - Jubei keeps going on and on about how no human sword can kill the Genma, but I can see her killing them with her own short sword right in front of me!

55 - Cool, another puzzle box. Just as easy as the last one though.
56 - Genma keep flying out of the sky in large numbers. I hate unlimited enemies, but these guys are easy enough, for now.

57 - Hey, a Test of Valor. It's a challenge to kill an axeman in less than a minute. Well, this toady goes down in 15 seconds thanks to Jubei's quickness and my strength.

59 - Oh no! Soki and Jubei get separated when a ladder is destroyed. Will we make it out alive? Well, yes. I find another ladder and unbar the door so we can meet up again.

60 - One final Test of Valor in the game's final minute! This time I have to fight off three axemen, but it's still pretty easy, we take them out in 38 seconds and receive a Bronze medal, dang. My reward is Grass. What the...? Well, that's it for the first hour of Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams.

Now for some scores out of 10.
Story: 7
As I stated in the introduction, Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams provides an alternative historical look at a turbulent time in Japanese history. This isn't something like Call of Duty where you're just a soldier in a war, this is a total rewrite with the same characters but with many more fictional elements. I believe that this kind of writing meshes really well with video games, and Dawn of Dreams is an example of that. However, I'm disappointed in how Capcom fumbled this opportunity because Dawn of Dream's story in the first hour starts dragging at the end. We get a great opening with interesting (and real) characters doing crazy things, but then we skip ahead two years and we find ourselves in a ghost town in the middle of nowhere. The game feels more like an American Western with swords (Rising Zan, anyone?) than a 16th century retelling set in turbulent Japan. Also, what the heck is going on with the Minokuchi character? That is seriously messed up and reminded me that I was just playing an insane Japanese video game instead of interacting with alternative historical fiction.

Graphics and Sound: 7
Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams suffers from the nasty case of awesome-looking-opening-cutscene-then-horrible-in-game-graphics syndrome. Of course, the in-game graphics aren't that bad, but after six full minutes of beautiful cutscenes, nothing will look that hot. The most recent generation of consoles is dissolving that difference quickly, but Dawn of Dreams still suffers from it. It's disappointing, and after a bunch of Xbox 360 and Nintendo DS games, that much more noticeable. The graphics were improved though since Onimusha 3 and the fully rendered environments are again welcome. This is probably one of the better looking PS2 games, but the art style is a little tired coming from an Onimusha veteran.

Sound is above average also, most notably the Japanese language option is music to my ears. Onimusha 2 only had English voices which ticked me off to no end, but is the only game in the series lacking Japanese.

Gameplay: 6
Dawn of Dreams just doesn't seem to compare to a game like God of War 2, which has much more fluid action and a larger variety of weaponry, even early on. Combat is relatively simple: target, attack, block, and a super move. There are timed criticals available in the first hour but that's about it. This would have definitely received a higher score if it would have let me control Jubei directly, something that is available later on (but why not right away...?). I've also noted in the past that fighting huge bosses early is usually a huge plus, but when they're this stupid, you can't help but think of how much hand holding is really going on. There seems to be a lot of depth though with weapon and armor power-ups, along with collecting more weapons with different attributes. I believe the game has some promise there. Can't forget the puzzle boxes either, those should provide a nice side challenge later on.

Fun Factor: 5
Onimusha's appeal lies in a great setting, interesting good and bad guys, and its action-oriented gameplay. Dawn of Dreams fails at nearly all of these completely in its first hour. After the opening scene we find ourselves in a deserted town with no explanation on why Soki is staying here. The only semi-interesting character is Mitsunari but he's relegated to the back seat while crazy stupid Minokuchi and his rope from nowhere tries to steal the show. And finally the action feels really confined and sometimes quite awkward. Targeting is a must, something that really wasn't necessary in the early Onimushas, and I even felt kind of weak compared to the skeleton peasants. Why aren't I taking them down in one or two swings? Also the fact that I have a second character tailing me but all I can do is tell her to fight or just stand there is a great opportunity lost.

Minutes to Action: 7

Overall: 6
Dawn of Dream's fun factor describes my overall feeling of its first hour: opportunities lost. It is set during a super interesting period of Japanese history, and the best story Capcom can come up with is that there are evil cherry blossom trees and that bugs are the cause of the genma? And why can't I control Jubei? The game's first hour is slightly above average though: the graphics look great when you don't compare them to the opening and the Japanese voice acting is stellar. Onimusha is an action game at heart and so it's not that huge of a loss when the story is underwhelming. There does feel like there is something lacking in the gameplay but it is still a solid hack-and-slash. Give Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams a try if you've played any of the others, but I would recommend starting at the beginning of the series if you're new to it.

Art by John Devlin - used with permission.

Game 26: Hotel Dusk: Room 215

Hotel Dusk: Room 215 is a point and click adventure game for the Nintendo DS. It was released early last year and features both interesting graphic styles and gameplay controls. As far as the graphics go, the characters are hand-drawn with a pencil and use no colors except for pencil shadings. The game is actually played quite differently too, instead of holding the DS like normal, you turn it on its side like you're reading a book. This gives you two vertical screens side-by-side that seem like it would be better for telling a dramatic story. It's definitely something to get used to when you first pick it up but it makes sense for the style of game it is. Speaking of the style of Hotel Dusk, something about this game reminds me of the old school scary game, Uninvited. Well, it scared me on the NES when I was eight years old!

Hotel Dusk is actually my first portable first hour review! Not sure why it took me 26 reviews to get to one, as I play portable games just as much as console and PC games. By the way, do you know how hard it is to get good screenshots of a portable game? Nearly impossible. Now let's get to the review.

(minutes are in bold)
00 - I click Start and the first hour of Hotel Dusk begins. A typewriter is flashing words on the screen giving me the date and location. Detective style music begins and the opening cutscene starts. The backgrounds look like photos, and then a character appears, he's completely pencil sketched! No coloring at all.

01- The man gets a call from Bradley, the next scene cuts to the docks where our pencil man shoots someone. Then he wakes up, "Just a dream," he says. Next scene, type goes too fast to read all the information. Actually this cutscene is moving pretty fast either way. The phone rings and the chief yells to get Hyde on the phone.
02 - Hyde, our hero, gets a page on his pager (did they have pagers in the late 70's?) Looks like he has an assignment. It's late December of 1979. Hyde is at a gas station returning the page on the pay phone. He's supposed to pick up a package at Hotel Dusk.

03 - The scene cuts to him driving away, even the fringes of the background are pencil drawn, very cool effect. Hyde drives by a woman on the road and then pulls into Hotel Dusk. Kyle Hyde introduces himself to me, I now have to use the stylus to advance text.

04 - The text appears on the right (bottom screen) and the action on the left. Hyde has been out of the force for three years and is now a salesman for Red Crown.

05 - Sounds like his boss doesn't run a totally clean shop as he has Hyde work a few side jobs here and there. Hyde says that this is what he'll be doing until he finds Bradley... I wonder who Bradley is?

06 - On the right is the hotel's front door, looks like I get to open it. I push on it and it creaks open. Chapter 1 begins, it's 5:00 PM on December 28th, 1979.
07 - I'm inside the lobby now, on the right screen I have a first person view of the entryway. Kyle is talking to himself on the left.

08 - Ah, very interesting! Now the first person view is on the left screen and an overhead view of the room is on the right. Looks like I'll be using the stylus to move Kyle around on the overhead map. I approach the front desk and examine it by clicking a magnifying glass icon.

09 - I'm able to examine all the things on the front desk, including a TV, clipboard, telephone, and calendar. Kyle has remarks about everything. I ring the bell. Quite a few times actually (I like being obnoxious in video games)!

10 - A man enters, the two screens feature Kyle on the left, and the man on the right. This guy looks a lot like Rocky Balboa from his latest movie of the same name. Creepy. I get some dialogue options, Kyle demands a room.
11 - The man's name is Dunning Smith, the hotel's owner. He welcomes me to his "little slice'a heaven."

12 - Dunning tries to talk to me into an expensive suite. I think I just need a regular room bud.

13 - He gives me a pen to fill out the registration. I'm able to scribble on the fields and Kyle Hyde's real information is filled out. Nifty.

14 - Dunning questions my name but then gives me my key. The key to room 215... *dun dun dun* The room is named "Wish."

16 - He also gives me a hotel brochure, this guy sure talks a lot.
17 - I tell Dunning that I'm waiting for a package, he doesn't look for it very hard. Says the bellhop will bring it up to me.

18 - I regain control on the overhead map, time to head to my room I guess. Woah, an old woman with an eye patch just walked in asking for a room! Creepy stuff! I'm now listening to her and Dunning talk.

19 - She wants the "special room, the wishing room." I bet I have the one she wants. Sucker.

20 - I enter the lobby area and wander a bit. All of a sudden Kyle starts talking to himself about Dunning and the reaction he had when he heard my name.
22 - Kyle does this thinking out loud bit two more times. I guess I should have questioned Dunning while talking to him!

23 - I enter the Central Hallway and take a moment to look at the map Dunning gave me. I poke at the first floor and can scroll around the map. Lots of areas are staff only, but it all doesn't seem that large. Wonder if the game can really keep it interesting with such a small area or if it'll expand? Guess we'll see (well, you won't in this review).

24 - I head for the stairs to the second floor, a young girl is sitting on the steps. I tell her to move it or lose it but she's being uncooperative. Kids these days.

26 - This kid sure is annoying, get off the stairs already! Or just go around her, she must way like 70 pounds.

the bane of my existence

27 - I finally get by her to the second floor, time to get to my room... until someone comes out of room 213 and stops me. There sure are a lot of people just wandering the halls. This ain't a bed and breakfast.

28 - Okay, the guy went back into his room already. Guess he didn't want to talk. Halfway down the hall and Dunning comes up behind me. He's pissed at me for hassling the little girl on the stairs.

29 - He tells me to get out before he throws me out. Holy crap, did I lose?! Sad music begins to play with the girl crying to herself again.

30 - Well, it really is Game Over. Geez. I click Retry and I'm back heading up the stairs...

31 - Guess I have to be nice to the girl this time.

33 - Still talking, she says she can't finish her puzzle. What the...

34 - It's a twenty piece puzzle with like five pieces not in place, this girl is pretty stupid if she can't finish this (or the game thinks I'm stupid and don't know how to use the DS). I use the stylus to drop the pieces in place.
35 - Now the girl is upset that she didn't finish it and throws it on the floor.

37 - My Lord, this is seriously the most obnoxious conversation ever. She finally runs off laughing that she tricked me with her crying. She left a puzzle piece behind, mysterious.

38 - I walk down the hallway and the guy from 213 stumbles out again. The guy introduces himself as Jeff Angel.

40 - I ask him a few questions about the girl on the stairs, he tells me her name is Melissa, from room 219. I also ask him why he said something about looking for a cop. He says it would be cool if there was a real violent crime here. Foreshadowing?

42 - I finally get to my room, but the game doesn't just let me in, I have to use my key.

43 - I set my suitcase down and the phone rings. I walk over to it and pick it up. It's Rachel, a cute woman that Kyle must work with. They talk for a bit about trust and rumors.
45 - She asks if the package has arrived yet, I'm supposed to give her a call when it does.

46 - I regain control and check out the room.

48 - When I reach an interesting part of the room, I can examine the surroundings more carefully and the overhead map becomes the first person view of the area. There I can click on objects and either collect them or listen to what Kyle has to say.

50 - The room and bathroom are all pretty grungy, not exactly high class. The shower is clean though and there is plenty of toilet paper.
51 - Not sure what else to do so I head back out to the hallway.

52 - I decide to knock on a few doors, something I would never do in real life, but then again I would never be a traveling salesman either or be such a jerk. I knock on 219 and Melissa's father opens the door. Well, he's already shut it, doesn't want to talk I suppose. Don't blame him. I did make his daughter cry in an alternate universe.

54 - Well, not sure what else to do so I head downstairs to question Dunning about those thoughts Kyle had before.

56 - He says another guest had the name of Kyle Hyde once. Odd. Kyle says it sounds like Bradley... He was in six months ago. But why would this guy pose as me?

58 - Next, Dunning tells me about the magic of room 215. Guests get their wishes after staying there a night. I wonder what Kyle's wish is? To find Bradley? To finally get with Rachel? To actually be colored in by his artist???

60 - I finish talking with the owner and that's the end of the first hour of Hotel Dusk: Room 215. I really feel like I have no idea what to do at the moment.

Now for some scores out of 10.
Story: 4
Because Hotel Dusk is such a story driven game, I really have to be critical here. Hotel Dusk does very little to develop itself within its first hour. It does a good job eluding at things such as Kyle's past as a cop and his history with Bradley and the mystery behind room 215 at the hotel. However, this is offset by the extremely slow pace at which things develop and the agonizingly long conversations between characters. I really think the game could have focused less on the long conversation with the owner, Dunning, and let me explore the hotel and let the setting tell its story. I won't even mention the 13 minutes it took to successfully get past the little girl on the stairs (with a game over in between). This is disappointing and makes me leery on how the game will present the rest of the story, it will no doubt be doled out very slowly and in small increments.
Graphics and Sound: 8
First things first, I really like the graphical style of Hotel Dusk. The backgrounds are static but the characters are hand-drawn and sort of have that Beavis and Butthead style shake to them (or if you're more of a gamer, The Last Express), which surprisingly works in this 1979 detective drama too. On the other hand (or should I say the other screen?), we have rather ugly looking 3D graphics representing Kyle Hyde's first person view of the hotel. I guess they have to be polygonal due to being able to walk around and check things out close up, but I think maybe trying something less realistic like Okami did would have been a better decision. Sound wise, the music is really good and fits the setting and the sound effects match your actions well. Not much else I can say about them. Once again, a little voice acting would have been nice but I recognize the medium, so I won't complain any more.
Gameplay: 6
A mixed bag here considering I spent more than half an hour just clicking an arrow to go to the next piece of conversation. I have to give them credit though for trying out something different with the way you hold the DS. It works great for Hotel Dusk. Walking around the hotel is a breeze because you point at an overhead map with the stylus to direct Kyle. There doesn't seem to be much variation though in the actions you can do, but it's nice to be able to zoom in on a part of the room and check out every object in it individually. Goes to show how much time the developers put into the small things. It's pretty obvious the game is a plodder but it works for the first hour at least.
Fun Factor: 3
Hotel Dusk's first hour is not that much fun, a little below average, honestly. Investigating the hotel is enjoyable, but there's only so many lamps I can poke at to keep things interesting. Seriously though, the game throws way too much dialogue at you right away and it's boring, uninspired writing! Okay, I'll give the writers some credit for the opening scenes and Kyle's background, but I don't want to spend 10 minutes talking to a seven year old girl on a staircase! It's a blatant waste of my time and honestly sucks. Getting a Game Over screen in a point and click adventure game also makes little sense in this day and age, we're not playing King's Quest anymore people!
Minutes to Action: 8
Overall: 4
The bad outweighs the good here, unfortunately. Hotel Dusk's first hour is a drag to play. The story has some inspiration going for it but is blown out by the bland and never-ending dialogue. This adversely affects basically every other aspect of the game's first hour, except for the graphics. Once again, I'll note that they're very good and the pencil sketch characters are a nice change from the anime style we're seeing so much of on the DS (Trauma Center and Castlevania of note). I really had high hopes for Hotel Dusk but it seems like the game may disappoint overall. Let's hope it turns itself around.

Game 22: Psychonauts

Psychonauts is a multiplatform adventure game from the creative mind of Tim Schafer, creator of some of my favorite games: Monkey Island, Full Throttle, and Grim Fandango. Up until recently, I had never played Psychonauts, call me cheap or call me foolish, but it's the sad truth. Times have changed though and Psychonauts is now a free game at Gametap through the end of the year! That did it for me and now I've been suckered into downloading Gametap and Psychonauts to my PC for the low price of free. Not a bad deal.

A little more on Psychonauts, it was released in 2005 to relatively lackluster sales but has since gathered a seemingly rabid fanbase. It has also been released on pretty much every digital distribution method including Steam, Xbox Live, and of course, Gametap. There aren't a lot of developers out there who are brave (or stupid) enough to make a "funny game," but Tim Schafer has the quality resume, so let's see if the first hour of Psychonauts lives up to his predecessors.

For my shorter review on the whole game, please see my Psychonauts review at Beyond the First Hour.

(minutes are in bold)
00 - I boot up the game for the first time, and it seems to sense I'm a Psychonauts first-time player and sends me right into the game. Now that just isn't right when I'm timing this game to the minute, so I spend a few minutes and finally make it back to what I think is the main menu (by the way, I have absolutely no problem with a game doing this, actually I think it's a good idea, but it was five minutes until I could reach the menu or even mess with the options). I'm running on top of a brain! I select new game and a cutscene starts with a tough sounding guy explaining the brain. The brain is the ultimate weapon! The first hour of Psychonauts has begun.

01 - It is the Psychic Age, and I am a Psychic Soldier. This scene is like one of those war briefings where an old yellowed projector is showing the brain with the commander yelling in front of it.
02 - He tells us that those who do not become Psychonauts will die! All the little kids start crying, including a kid with a tin foil hat on! Okay, no one is really going to die. The game looks pretty good, has that cool Grim Fandango-like art style.

03 - All of a sudden whom I assume is the main character falls from the ceiling crashing the party. The instructors try to psychically attack the boy, but they fail. His name is Razputin, or Raz for short.

04 - Raz apologizes for being late and is lightly reprimanded. The voice acting is also excellent. Great emotion and the voices fit the characters well.
05 - Well, maybe Raz's voice seems a little old for how young he looks, but it's still great. Raz explains to the group why he should be allowed to stick around the Psychonauts training camp.

06 - Raz can't have any paranormal training until he gets his parent's consent. He is very passionate about training to become a Psychonaut. Dogen explains that he wears his tin foil hat because he once made someone's head explode.

07 - The three instructors argue over Raz's mind, they all seem to have a plan for it. Loading.

08 - Time to create a profile... I leave his name as Raz. The profile creation screen all takes place in the kids' bunk. Class is at six tomorrow morning!

09 - An eye exam, probably the start of my training as a player. Some old guy explains PSI Challenge Markers and PSI Cards. Collection stuff I guess.
10 - Ah, they're actually for learning new psychic powers.

11 - Loading again. Raz walks out of his cabin and some kids yell not to miss Basic Braining! That's good stuff.

12 - I finally have control over Raz. WASD move him around while the mouse is used for controlling the camera. Since this game is also available for the Xbox and PS2, I can also use the PS2 controller I have plugged into my computer, but I'll stick with keyboard/mouse controls unless the platforming gets obnoxious.
13 - Tons of stuff to see in the area and collect. I find a purple arrowhead when digging up a plant. Talking to kids is as easy as pressing F, there's a peeping tom kid! Kid's parents allow him to watch R-rated movies! Hahaha!

15 - Tin foil hat kid is talking to squirrels. Creepy kid. All the other kids are carrying out conversations in real time too, neat stuff.

16 - The character's faces exhibit a lot of emotion. Must be the giant eyes.